Chapter You-Don't-Care-About-This-Number: Let's face It; You Expected This from Me“Mum, I have something to tell you,” Aizel said. He swallowed around the enormous lump in his throat; he could hardly breathe around it. He cast an unsure glance to Torian, who only smiled reassuringly. After a small moment, Aizel returned the smile with what Kavo could only declare undeniable love. He didn’t know how someone so young had found a love so pure and simply, but he was happy that Aizel had, and he was happy that Torian was a part of it. They were a sweet couple, from the little that Kavo had seen, while that admittedly wasn’t much.
“What is it?”
“I, um… Torian and I… well, I… erm, I’ve chosen my life partner?”
“Your… life partner?”
“Yes,” Aizel said. “I’m with Torian. I want to marry him.”
Gwendolyn pressed a hand to her chest and gasped. “Oh my… I hadn’t even noticed…” She nearly collapsed, but she somehow stayed upright. “Are you sure?”
“Undoubtedly. I would love to spend the rest of my life with him.”
“And you, Torian?” she asked, almost as if she was trying to find some sort of objection. None came; Hawk and Kavo thought they suited each other, and they obviously weren’t going to condemn their own relationship after the work and effort and emotions which they had put into it. “Well, I suppose I haven’t much choice…”
“Mum, I wasn’t trying to give you a choice,” Aizel explained. “I thought that, as my mother, you deserved to know. When I am in love, you should know. I tell you well enough when I hate someone, too.”
“Still, Aizel… Torian… he’s eight years your elder.”
“Seven and a half,” Torian said.
“That’s not helpful,” Aizel replied.
“I’m sorry.”
“I know.”
“In any case,” Gwendolyn interrupted, before they could start the kissing she could feel nearing, “Even if I do not find it agreeable, I am in no position to deny you.”
“So you approve?”
“I wouldn’t say I approve, but of course, Aizel, you can do as you please. I would not stop you. Just tell me this: Torian, do you love my child? Will you promise to take care of him?”
“Of course,” Torian said. “I plan to spoil him every chance I get.”
“That is all I can ask.” She smiled almost sadly and moved past them to go to her room. It must have been hard for her, Kavo realized, being the only single person on the ship. Now that the other four of them had paired off—and there was even a pair of pairs, really—she must have felt lonely and left out. But there was no way Kavo was going to share, and he was quite aware of Hawk’s capacity for jealousy. If she was out looking for love again, she wouldn’t find it on the ship any time soon.
Aizel hugged Torian tightly, pressing almost every inch of his still-small frame against Torian. “I love you,” he murmured.
“I love you, too.” He brushed Aizel’s light hair away from his face gently, his fingers lingering to graze the skin reverently. “I’m glad your mom didn’t try to kill me.”
Aizel laughed. “Me too. I’m not much for necrophilia.”
“Hm, not much? Does that mean you are somewhat?”
Laughing again, Aizel hit him lightly. “You know what I meant!”
“I know,” Torian said, “But you’re adorable when I tease you.” He leaned in for a warm, sweet kiss, and Kavo turned away; he didn’t want to intrude anymore, and he already had before. He had seen quite enough of the two of them kissing. Thinking about anything else would have been fine.
As he thought that, a flock of birds swooped past them. They were nothing close to falcons or hawks, but of course, Kavo still turned to Hawk. Even if it weren’t something so obvious, though, Kavo couldn’t have guaranteed it wouldn’t have made him think of his lover; it seemed that everything nowadays reminded him of Hawk. Even things like floor wax and spatulas would eventually lead back to the one person who was subsequently always on his mind; times he didn’t think of Hawk were rare, but not prized. Kavo loved thinking of Hawk almost as much as he loved being with him; it was certainly the next best things, and sometimes it was all he had to look forward to.
“Kavo, now that that is sorted out, would you like to return to our room?”
“Actually… I had something I wanted to show you. C’mere.”
Hawk tilted his head. “What is it?”
“You’ll see. Follow me.” He took Hawk’s large, warm hand, smiling; he felt like a little child holding on to his father’s hand, except he was much more intimate with Hawk than he would ever consider being with any of his family members, of course.
“Kavo, you know I do not appreciate your surprises. It is not anything horrible, is it?” Despite his complaints, Hawk did not once look ready to stop following him. It was rather funny, actually.
“It’s nothing bad. I think you’ll like it. It’s quite nice.”
Kavo turned a corner and went through a small tunnel to come out in a maze. After navigating through it quickly, Hawk’s hand still clasped in his, Kavo reached his destination.
They were encased in a hemispherical, transparent cover. Light reflected and refracted off of it, shining glimmering rainbows of light everywhere. The clamour— the clangs and clicks and clunks and chinks— of the ship went unnoticed in that room; they were all but inaudible. Instead, the music of the wind filled the air. Kavo loved that; it was his second-favourite song, second only to when Hawk called his name.
“Kavo, this is…”
“It’s the observation deck. They used to use it for astronomers, before they had programmed all the GPS systems. My ship hadn’t had one, so it took me a while to find this one.”
“It is beautiful up here.”
“You should see it when the stars are out.”
Hawk looked at him, and Kavo melted under the serenity, the childlike excitement buried in his amber eyes. “Can we?”
“Tonight?” Kavo grinned. “We really shouldn’t. Not with what we do at night… but I could never tell you no.”
“Then it is settled. Meet me out here tonight.”
Hawk kissed him and quickly jogged off to do whatever it was that Hawk did while he was gone. Kavo stared after him, infatuated, for a moment before he noticed.
“Hey, that was my line!” he called.
Hawk gave a cheeky smile. “I know,” he said before disappearing through the tunnel. Kavo smiled and sat down, draping an arm across his knee as he stared at the expanse of sky and glimmering rainbows.
Kavo didn’t move until Hawk returned, looking as gorgeous as ever and more. The sun was setting now, and the colours of the rainbows turned warm. Gold like liquid seemed to drench every inch of the observatory, and most particularly Hawk; it ignited something even more stunning in his amber eyes and set his skin ablaze. Kavo was finding it hard to catch his breath at the sight.
“Hey,” Kavo said nervously. He’d been trying to calm himself, to no avail; the moment he saw the beauty that was Hawk, the butterflies residing in his stomach began to stir.
Hawk smiled softly at him. That only made the awful creatures more enthusiastic.
“I am glad you found this place. It is very beautiful up here.”
“Yeah. Me too,” was all Kavo could manage. His heart had swollen and risen into his throat, feeling quite like an uncomfortable hot air balloon, preventing anything except an excruciatingly shaky voice from exiting.
Hawk clearly noticed that Kavo was acting a bit abnormally, but he didn’t seem inclined to comment just yet. Kavo knew, though, that if he acted a touch too strange for a smidge too long, Hawk would question him ceaselessly; hopefully it would not come to that, because Kavo rather wanted to propose properly and not be pressured into it, especially if he could keep Hawk none the wiser.
“So,” Kavo asked, “What did you want to stay out here for?”
“For one, it is very nice here. Other than that, however, there is actually something I have to ask of you. Honestly, I have been wanting to ask you, but I could never find the right time or place. However, I may not ever get the chance after tonight, so I am afraid that it is impossible to delay any longer. Before I begin, I have to ask that you please do not interrupt me before I have finished.
“Alright,” Kavo agreed, “What is it?” His eyes shone with concern. Hawk was worried about something, and Kavo wanted to wipe all his fears away as he always did.
“I know that we have not been together romantically long enough for either of us to have truly forged an opinion on what a life together might be like, but I think I have made up my mind nonetheless. I do not know if you feel the same way as I do, but I must still ask.”
Kavo’s heart thumped alarmingly in his chest. He could hardly think of what Hawk was going to say; surely they were about to break up. “Wait,” he said, “Hear me—”
“I told you not to interrupt. Let me finish. Kavo, I… I want to spend our lives together. I want to get married.”
Kavo blinked. Then he blinked some more. Then, suddenly, he burst into laughter. “Really?”
Hawk, understandably, looked rather insulted. “I apologize. I had not meant it as a joke.”
“No— I know that— it’s just… I had planned to ask you the same thing.” Kavo extracted the ring from his pocket. “I was going to propose to you tonight and ask you to spend whatever may be left of our lives together. Do you think you can grant my wish?”
A smile slowly spread across Hawk’s face as he took Kavo into his arms. “Only if you will grant mine, my tackila.”
Kavo smiled. “I’m yours.”
Hawk pressed their lips together firmly, leaving no room for doubt in Kavo’s mind that he was wanted and perhaps even needed. Kavo kissed back just as fervently, his hands moving to unlace Hawk’s shirt. He would consummate this new stage in their relationship before tomorrow night, just in case. It never hurt to be too cautious.
And it certainly never hurt to spend more time lavishing attention on Hawk.
“Kavo,” Hawk gasped, as if the name itself had brought him back from the very depths of hell. “It is very hard to believe that you… tell me, why would you do this for me? You could have returned to your life even still, yet you have now sworn yourself to me.”
Kavo pressed his forehead against Hawk’s, smiling broadly. “I couldn’t have. I’ve fought against the government now, betrayed them. There is no life left for me. And even if there was… I can’t leave you, you idiot. I need you. Life without you wouldn’t make any sense anymore.”
Hawk closed his shining eyes and smiled the first genuine smile Kavo had ever seen from him as tears spilled onto his elegant cheekbones. Kavo’s breath caught at the beauty of the experience; Hawk had never looked more angelic or more perfectly calm than in that one emotional moment.
“Thank you,” Hawk whispered. Each word to Kavo sounded like a glimmering hope of a sunbeam after a cold, dark and starless night; each syllable was a breath of fresh air after emerging from a six-foot-deep coffin. “I never had thought that I would… that we would… To think that I would find peace…”
Kavo’s eyes drifted closed, and he reverently brushed his lips against Hawk’s to show his understanding and agreement; he himself had never in a thousand years pictured that he could be truly happy with someone whom he could call a soul mate— and a man, no less. It had been entirely unpredictable from the beginning, but he wouldn’t have had it any other way. Hawk was the only person in the world who could make him swoon with a glance.
“I do want you to know that… I love you, Kavo.” Hawk’s attentive gaze touched his entire face and bore into his soul. “I only wanted revenge. Too distraught with my past, I never looked at what was really important. I owe my future to you.”
Kavo tangled a hand in Hawk’s long black hair, shaking it loose from the confines of the leather tie holding it in place. “I feel the same, you know,” Kavo replied honestly. “If it weren’t for you, I’d still be the same asshole running around, thinking he was infallible. But now I know that it’s okay not to be, and I just… you probably know the type of pressure that takes off of me. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of having you beside me.”
“My tackila…” Hawk rubbed his thumb along Kavo’s jaw while his eyes wandered over Kavo’s genuine face. “Can you accept who I am?” He seemed truly worried that Kavo would choose now to turn back, but Kavo erased his fears with a hasty kiss.
“I could never reject you. You are my one and only.” Smiling, Kavo said, “Are we through with the chick flick moments?”
Hawk chuckled, a low, deep rumble that made Kavo’s hair stand on end with energy and electricity. “I suppose we can be. What would you instead propose?”
“A few select things come to mind.” Kavo traced his fingers over Hawk’s sternum, a mischievous smile playing across his face. “After all,” he reasoned, “We technically haven’t spent our first night together.”
“You do have a point.”
“I vote,” Kavo murmured against Hawk’s unresisting lips, “That you put this monstrous body of yours to good use.”
Hawk’s firm hands ran up Kavo’s legs to rest lightly on his hips. “I imagined you might. What would you have me do?” A glint in Hawk’s eyes told that he knew exactly what Kavo wanted, every little bit of it, but he was being a tease.
“Don’t you play coy.” Kavo licked the corner of Hawk’s mouth, taking enormous delight in the shudder that racked the man’s large frame. “I mean, I could go on for hours about how much I want you buried deep inside me, but I figure that you’ve heard it enough.”
“As if I could grow tired of hearing you tell me.” Hawk held Kavo against him as he leaned in for a deep, intimate kiss. Their tongues danced, the tastes of each other’s mouths mingling. To Kavo, it was the second-best taste in the world, bested only by the unique and exotic taste of Hawk’s skin. It was as if his genes flavoured his skin, every inch drenched in the warmth and spice of the Islands. Simply thinking about it made him crave it, made him yearn for even the smallest taste. No one else had ever been so desirous to Kavo; no one except Hawk could make every sense alight.
“You are,” Kavo breathed between increasingly ardent caresses, “The most beautiful fucking man on the planet.”
“Not true,” Hawk returned, “Although I must say you cannot be too far off, because I currently have him in my arms.”
Their lips met again as clothing began to be removed, being shucked by their desperate, wanton hands. Kavo kept trying to work Hawk’s pants off him even as he shimmied out of his own; their shirts were already long forsaken in the corner. Soon their pants and undergarments joined them, tossed to be forgotten as well.
Immediately, Hawk’s hands were working on Kavo. One stroked across his flushed chest and a pert nipple while the other traced sinful patterns along even more sinful regions of his body. Kavo knew better than to return the favour; that would only end in a battle for dominance which would, in turn, end in his complete and utter surrender of all power; he knew this. He also knew that he would get his turn to explore Hawk’s body so long as he behaved while Hawk explored his, charted the unknown. But it was so hard to behave with a strong hand hovering just over his erection and being a very frustrating tease.
Kavo hadn’t pegged Hawk to be the teasing type; he had imagined that if they did finally have sex, it would be powerful and meaningful, but straight and to the point. It was quite the opposite— of to the point, because it was powerful, and it was meaningful, but Hawk loved to tease and torture and spend every possible second driving Kavo absolutely mad. He was certainly damn good at it, too.
“Gods, do you know how to do this quickly?” Kavo asked breathlessly; Hawk’s actions already had him ready to break.
“Of course not,” was Hawk’s reply. “Love is not quick. Why should I be when I make it? Love is maddening and all-consuming; I endeavour to make it the same way.”
“You’re damn good at it,” Kavo muttered. He didn’t have a chance to say anything else, though, because Hawk’s hand gripped his erection firmly and all thoughts were lost to his wanton cries. His body was already begging for release, convulsing and all but thrashing beneath Hawk. The worst part was that Hawk had hardly laid a hand on him and he was ready to give up on holding back.
“I am glad you think so.” Hawk chuckled again, sending the same electricity through Kavo as he had earlier, only it was magnified by his steadily growing arousal.
“Would you shut up and take me, you bastard?” Kavo gasped, arching into the devilish hand wrapped around him.
Hawk’s smile didn’t fade as he moved to settle between Kavo’s legs. There were no more words uttered, but their stares spoke volumes of feelings that couldn’t yet be put into words; language had no place there in that moment. Only their hearts belonged, and only to each other. Nothing else was a necessity so long as they had each other, and neither of them cared for that to change.
“Are you ready, my tackila?”
Kavo rolled his eyes but smiled. “If you’re not entering me in the next five seconds, know that I will leave you for my hand.”
Kavo could feel Hawk’s smirk as he captured his lips. “Understood,” was mumbled into his mouth, and then Kavo felt him obey.
His entire being began to tear and reform as Hawk pushed inside of him. Hawk grabbed Kavo’s hips, adjusting them and angling them up to the point that Kavo had absolutely no leverage to do anything except take it. He didn’t mind.
“My beautiful tackila,” Hawk murmured, “You will know nothing but pleasure tonight.”
“You’ve never shown me anything else, Chayton.”
“I would hope I had not.” He pulled Kavo’s hips closer to him, burying the last inch inside. “Are you settled?”
“Really, Chayton…”
“I know. I am sorry.” He kissed Kavo’s forehead. “Just do not let me harm you.” With those last words, he moved.
Kavo’s heart nearly exploded because of the overtime it went into. He wanted to either rut against Hawk or shy away from the pain, but he couldn’t; he no longer had control of his hips, as they were being held and supported by Hawk’s hands, and he didn’t have the sense to verbalize either of his desires. Instead, he lay there, panting and writhing, as Hawk slowly drew in and out of him.
Kavo threw his head back as beads of sweat coalesced on his skin. A fire was erupting and spreading inside him, devouring his core. Only he and Hawk were left, only the two of them alone in the world, and everything was perfect. Everything in life was complete.
Hawk nibbled lightly on Kavo’s Adam’s apple, sending a violent shiver through him. Kavo didn’t have to look to know that Hawk was smirking down at him as his tongue darted out to lap at Kavo’s glistening collarbone.
“You are beautiful. Do you know that? You are so perfectly beautiful.”
“Chayton,” Kavo whispered, “I love you. I love you so much.”
Kavo’s arms felt like heavy, wet noodles as he raised them to encircle Hawk’s neck. He bent to pull his body up and kiss Hawk deeply, his tongue seeking out the uniquely addicting taste of Hawk’s delicious mouth. Hawk showed his appreciation of this action with a low groan, his lips and chest vibrating against Kavo with the deep noise; it made Kavo tremble and struggle to press closer, but Hawk held firm.
“Do not tempt me to tease you more,” Hawk warned. “If you are not careful, you may never find your release tonight.”
Kavo nipped Hawk’s lip lightly. “I had better. I could always just return the favour.”
“Who says I would not want that?”
Kavo pushed on Hawk’s shoulders. “You’re the one who took the initiative.”
Hawk nuzzled Kavo’s neck. “Should I move?”
“Do you want to?”
Hawk gave a mischievous grin. Carefully, he held onto Kavo and turned until Kavo was straddling him, his back resting against the mattress.
“Have your turn, then,” Hawk said.
Kavo braced himself against Hawk’s very warm, muscular chest, panting for a moment. Every single part of his body was throbbing with arousal and desire, and he wanted to make love to Hawk in a thousand ways. He situated, stared deep into Hawk’s intense eyes, and moved.
They didn’t break eye contact once as Kavo moved, up and down on Hawk’s hips. Kavo had never been more turned on in his life by any one human being, but with Hawk’s glowing gaze trained on him, he felt devilishly flushed, and a blush spread throughout his whole body. Hawk was doing a good enough job of pleasuring him just by lying there and simply being erect. But then, his eyes flicked down— Kavo felt a special part of his anatomy twitch— and then back up… then he reached out and wrapped his hand around Kavo’s erection.
Kavo nearly exploded on the spot. Hawk was unrelenting, though, with his large hand pumping in time to Kavo’s increasingly uncoordinated motions.
Kavo was the one to finally break eye contact when he threw his head back in complete, unbridled pleasure. His whole body was alight with fire and sparks of electricity and arousal that he’d never known before Hawk. There were quite a few things, it seemed, that he’d never known before Hawk entered his life, and each of them was more amazing than the last. It amazed him to be shown true, unconditional love, to have those same feelings, to find someone who wanted to give him the world, and to not even want the world… Hawk was the world when Kavo held him in his arms.
Kavo felt Hawk lean in, and his warm tongue caressed Kavo’s chest as if it were the most delicious delicacy in the world. Given how much Kavo loved the taste of Hawk’s bare skin, it wasn’t entirely inconceivable that Hawk might think the same of his.
“Chayton, I’m about to…”
“I know. Me too.” Hawk’s husky voice sent yet more electricity coursing through Kavo. He was pretty sure he was going to be electrocuted soon.
One more squeeze of Hawk’s hand was all it took for Kavo’s world to shatter in a flash of white. His whole body went numb as neurons exploded in sparks and fire. Distantly, he could feel Hawk reacting in the same way, but he hardly took notice beyond feeling it somehow beneath his numbness.
The world began to reform slowly. Panting, Kavo lifted off of Hawk and collapsed on his back next to him.
“Wow. That was…” he started breathlessly, chest heaving. He couldn’t find a worthy adjective to describe it, though, and ended up only repeating, “Wow.”
“Yeah,” Hawk agreed, sounding like he was in the same state as Kavo. It was one of the very limited times Kavo had heard his diction imperfect, and it was beautiful.
It was another long while before either of them moved, their weary and oversensitive bodies not motivated enough to even consider shifting. Hawk was the first to find the energy, and he gingerly rolled onto his side and draped an arm across Kavo’s firm abdomen. Kavo lifted his own heavy arm and encircled Hawk’s neck, pulling him down until his head rested on Kavo’s shoulder. Hawk nuzzled Kavo’s neck in response and gently kissed his collarbone.
“Thank you for not giving up on me.”
Kavo smiled and raked his hand through Hawk’s tangled mass of black hair. “You’re welcome.” His hand trailed down, travelling along the dip where Hawk’s spine was. Hawk closed his eyes as a peaceful, sleepy silence settled over them.
Kavo could sense it the instant Hawk fell asleep; even though there was no tension to be drained from his being, there was something different, something innocent and easy about the way he held onto his lover. It made Kavo smile gently and nuzzle into the crook of his neck, truly comfortable for one of the few times in his life.
Tomorrow, they would fight. Tonight, they simply let the world fade away, content to steal the last vestiges of calm before the storm.